Love the One You’re with: Fall for Your New Home with These Top Tips
A KlopasStratton blog by: Bridget Chambers, Life Coach, Writer
Wondering where all your neighbors went? Well... they’ve moved on! And it’s not just your imagination. According to the 2021 U.S. Census Bureau, about 26.4 million people (or eight percent of the population) in the U.S. moved from one home to another last year. In spite of a pandemic that stalled homeowners’ myriad future plans, 2020 saw even higher rates of relocation in real estate markets across the country.
This year, things are predictably slower. This trend is in line with cyclical factors, the relative slowdown of a sweeping pandemic, and the idea that with people moving in 2020 and 2021, people are just plain staying put!
(When considering moving, however, homeowners should consider that the best time to list is the best time for them. Getting wrapped up in trends, statistics, and novice advice can make for a very confusing next step. Consider asking an expert – Sophia Klopas and Jason Stratton help to take the heavy lifting out of hard decisions.)
If you’re looking for ways to spruce up your new space, there is endless guidance online – from Pinterest, to Etsy, to, um, AMAZON! However, often after periods of marked transition, there can be a lull and stage of stagnancy that feels practically paralyzing. As a coach, I see this constantly. Human beings are better at being busy than not (even though quiet time is good for the soul). We can forget that the time after a big decision is as important as the decision itself, and we find ourselves lost in feelings of confusion, chaos, or worse… regret.
Fear not! Here are our best tips to love the new home you’re in right now:
- Trust the process because you’re putting in the work
As nice as it would be to complete tasks with the simple snap of the fingers, that’s simply not the way it works with home ownership. The process of moving, settling, and creating a lasting foundation takes time – and it’s something that cannot be rushed. When you lay your head on the pillow at night, it can be easy to get lost in the sea of thoughts that taunt you with what you haven’t yet completed. Change the tune of the chorus to strike a more positive note: You’re doing the best you can! Make small tasks a big deal. In other words, when you accomplish something like unpacking a box or cleaning out the garage, make it a point to celebrate your win. Little by little, you will have made the process work for you… and what is new will feel like old hat in no time.
- Look to your highest values to show you where to go next
What makes your house feel like home? One way to get fully immersed in your new space is by deciding which parts of it feel the least like you. No, really! Is there a room in your new house with unpalatable wallpaper? A front greenspace with no pizazz? Carpeting that needs a major makeover? Start with what you don’t like and turn it into what you love. This will make you feel more at home…and it’ll make your new house feel like a place you already love to live.
- Stay OUT of foreboding joy (where you operate under the false belief that you can prevent disappointment or failure by predicting it)
There is a difference between throwing pink paint on the tough stuff (i.e. being so positive it’s unrealistic) and being downright unconstructive with your streams of consciousness. If something feels off, that’s a good sign it needs fixing. However, take notice not to fix yourself into fixating – a process that breeds completely made-up worries where everything feels like a foreshadowing of doom. For instance, if you realize that your new home is entailing more cosmetic work that you anticipated, just commit to fixing it. Don’t let that be an unfair negative predictor for how this happy this house will make you down the road. In other words, don’t make a bad day fool you into thinking you made the wrong move, into the wrong house, with the wrong people! J
When it comes to making moves, it is clear that we American homeowners aren’t afraid to pack up and go. (At least not according to the yearly census!) It’s once we’ve arrived in the new place that things can feel a little dicey. To avoid that, it is imperative that we trust ourselves enough to get settled where we are. It is important to remember that nothing worthwhile happens overnight, and that sometimes, the clarity to confront what’s ahead is often found somewhere behind us.
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